my boyfriend broke up with me after a year and a half relationship. He drinks and has a short temper and when we fought he would emotionally abuse me, he said he hated me, would curse at me and wish i was dead. HE ended the relationship during a fight, but the thing is, when we wouldn't fight we would laugh together and joke around, be intimate. Plus i was always there for him, I made him dinner, did his wash. gave him love. I'm wondering if he would ever call me again cause i feel we still have a bond.


Answers




Who really knows if you will hear from him again. I can see that you seem to be a kind, caring person. However; I worry that if he emotionally abused you, you still feel that he would be validating you if he came back with you?

I know you cared so much, but you have to care for yourself as well--if he deserves you, he will change.

I sadly don't see it happening, yet, I do wish you well. I really do empathize with you--its unfair to treat you great one day and bad the next.

Best wishes, and treat yourself well too--you deserve happiness as well!





Yes, it does appear that you have a bond with this guy, but it isn't a good one. I'm sorry for your hurt in this break up, but it sounds like it is best for you, imo.

Try to focus on who you are right now, do good things for yourself, work at being a person who is complete within herself, and then when you find someone who is just as complete, that will be a wonderful experience.

Guys and gals who are abusive have many issues and don't make good partners in life. You might have a tendency to seek out and link up with this type of guy, and by finding who you really are and want you really want, that will lessen your attraction by/to abusive partners.

good wishes!

drjean





If u really care about this guy, I think u should call him or if u dont have his number, try any other way possible 2 get in contact with him. I just dont think he ever cared about u otherwise, he wouldnt have abused u.





Your situation is so similiar to mine. My boyfriend and I have been broken up for 2 months now and I tried everything possible to try to work it out, only to fail. I found out that he has been out drinking 3 to 4 times a week since our break up and he is not taking care of himself. He has chosen alcohol over me and this is how it would always be.

During this breakup, he ignored me and would really only communicate through text message. I was not strong enough to let go and I ended up being perceived as the crazy one. I think it is OK to put yourself out there and tell him how you feel. However, if you go overboard with contacting him, you will only be ashamed of how you behaved once you are able to see clear and realize that an abusive-alcoholic is very wrong for you.

I do not agree that he did not love you just because he abused you. Abusers will act like this even to people they love. It is the only way they know and they will abuse the next person they date. I would not contact him. You should only get back together if he comes back on his own, realizes what he did was wrong, and working on getting professional help for himself. If this does not occur, you will end up back in an abusive cycle with an alcoholic.

You need to learn from this experience and you will become a better person. Unfortunately, he may not realize what he has done because his addiction controls his life. Therefore, he will repeat this behavior with his next relationship. You need to be grateful that you got out now before it got any worse.





WELL IF YOU PLAN ON BEING A GINNY PIG CONTINUE, BUT IF I WAS YOU LIFE IS TOO SHORT CHASING AT A PERSON WITH A PROBLEM LIKE THAT. HIS PROBLEM IS BIGGER THAN YOU. OH SO YOU WANT TO PLAY GOD AN MAKE HIM RIGHT AGAIN???PLEASE GIRL YOU FOOLING YOURSELF. WHO MADE YOU AN EXPERT DOCTOR OF LOVE??YOU NEED TO MOVE ON AN FINE JESUS AN YOU BE A CHANGE LADY. ROMANS 10 CHAPTER AN 9TH VERSE.PEACE ALWAYS