I need more advice! My best friend keeps putting me down, saying how I'm dumb and she's so smart and all, but she pretends it's a joke. She knows i have a lot of self-hate, she knows i self-injure (even though she won't talk about it) but she keeps telling me i'm stupid and it really hurts! I want to stop talking to her because I know I don't deserve this, but she doesn't have ANY other friends other than me, she might tell about my problems if i leave and we have some really really great times together. I've had a lot of breakups with friends in the past- a LOT and i don't wanna lose another but i deserve better than this, don't i? What should i do?


Answers




I would say your friend is changing to how she looks and sees life. I had a best friend starting at 12 yrs until 19yrs. We just stopped being friends, we drifted apart. People do change as they age. Your friend has personal issues within her self and not with you. I would suggest leaving your friend alone and finding another best friend. If her comments are hurting you...I dont care if she says shes joking....its hurting you move away from her. LilDogee66@aol.com





My friend, I do not see how you can call her a friend after she is treating you the way she is. I do agree, you do deserve better.

I would set her down with you, ask her face to face to explain her problems with you and why she treats you so--do not try to get aggravated or hostile, even though you may feel that way--and hopefully she will explain herself.

I almost have a Ph.D., and have had people in the past call me stupid, because they knew that it hurt my feelings, and bothered me. Perhaps this is why she's doing it to you? She knows you are smart or has had heard someone call you smart and it bothers her?

A lot of the time, the people who bully/bother us are only doing so because they have issues themselves they are trying to work through, and they feel better for a bit by making others feel worse.

Explain to her how it makes you feel and explain to her that you would be willing to help her out with her problems if she wants you to do so.

Best wishes,

Clyde