Alright.
I think i have officially lost it. I fought with my best friend this week for a good day about her smoking weed. By the way my personal opinion on weed is that stoners and supporters should have their teeth kicked in. I used to smoke weed but then i asked my self why and i couldnt answer my self so i quit. Also i think it is harmful mentally in so many ways and i have seen what it has done to me and people close to me. Anyways. I told her i dont want to be friends with a stoner. But after a good 3 hours of fighting im still her friend but i dont know if its going to be for very long. All my friends smoke weed and i cant stand it. I have had many anger issues in the past. I dont do anything about it because i think the idea of using any substance or chemical to suppress feelings is pathetic and show that you have no control over your own body. I am a really nice guy but i keep my anger bottled up until im about to break someone in half. So i guess my question is. Should i keep my only friends? What should i do about this anger. If you read my other questions from the past you can see that i have a lot of things in my past. And the anger i am feeling is this calm almost insane psychotic feeling. Im just calling it anger because my heart it racing and my eyes also have this ghostly feeling. This isnt normal in any way. I know im suffering from depression and anxiety. I have not been to a doctor to confirm this but if you knew me you would understand. I am open to all questions and input. Please help me.


Answers




Hi

keeping anger bottled up inside is very unhealthy, both mentally as well as physically. You need to find ways to release your anger without taking it out on other people, whether or not you agree with their lifestyle choices.

The very fact that you think people who have a problem with drugs need to have "their teeth kicked in" is alarming....violence doesnt help people get off drugs! I am not condoning their use of it, but you ranting at them about it is not exactly a way to give them reason to aspire to being like you to quit.

I agree that people should try to take control of their actions and habits where they can. But you do also need to realize that some people suffer from chemical imbalances in their brains, or from other illness that results in them needing to be medicated. So I disagree with the emphatic tone your statement that: >>"I have had many anger issues in the past. I dont do anything about it because i think the idea of using any substance or chemical to suppress feelings is pathetic and show that you have no control over your own body."

your post seems to be very much about the fact that you are *not* able to control your anger and that you may well need help! Not necessarily by medication, but rather by seeing a psychotherapist who can hopefully teach you anger management

if you feel your friends are a bad influence on you then you should move into different circles. but if you care about them, and want to help them make better lifestyle choices, then what better way than to show them that you are able to live your life without weed and still have fun and not be uptight! People learn a lot more from our example than just from our words.





Hi,

I think you need you ask you friends the question- Why? like you did the same for yourself. You set a tone and example by being independent of drugs and better without it. It's good that you have genuine concern for your friends well being although you must keep in mind your own well being must always come before anyone's. considering that you have smoked before you know what they are going through and can sympathize for the predicament they have put themselves in. If you can quit, they can to. It may sound extreme but for people to budge in some situations you need to give them the worst cenario: Our friendship or drugs. Is drugs worth more than the value of our friendship?

You must be so outraged to react that way but I understand it's out of care for your best friend. To communicate with her you may her to connect with her and remember what it felt like to be in her current position. Maybe you can help her the same way you helped yourself by helping her realize why she is involved with the drug.

If things don't work out you should never blame yourself. You do you best in trying to help change her situation but if she wishes to remain the same way, move on. You probably did all you can possibly do. Your health and well being is better off without the stresses of others harmful and self-destructive decisions. If you keep your feelings bottled then absolutely nothing will be solved with what you wish to accomplish.

You have wondered if you have depression or anxiety problems get yourself tested by first a pyshician which can further lead you to a therapist. You can even talk to someone you test or search for ways to release what ever anger or emotion you are feeling.